The Families' Tale

We got there in the end

2008-04-07T12:32:00.000-07:00

and Connie did a fantastic impression of the tortoise in the proverb on the way.

I'll post separately about Wye where we stayed on Thursday night. It is a beautiful place and well worth a visit.

We left town via a footpath which wasn't technically part of either the Pilgrims Way or the North Downs Way, but it led to both and we were soon climbing steeply up through woodland. Ann-Marie who is fit and had been given some walking poles by one of Nigel's friends steamed ahead whereas Connie who by then was in a lot of pain with her knee, and I struggled.

We got through and met some interesting "people" on the way. It was helpful too to get a sign that we were still going in the right direction.

About half way along our route we passed Godmersham Park House which was owned by Jane Austen's brother. I did look in the lake to see if I could find Colin Firth but alas I was unlucky - this may be because it was February and Mr Firth was keeping warm inside, or perhaps it was because, despite what it says in the link above, the novel associated with the house is actually Mansfield Park not Pride and Prejudice. There was a lovely fallen old tree in the grounds which gave them more of a Thornfield feel, and Connie got a very unflattering photo of me climbing over the fence to get at it, but I'm not going to show you that one - instead you can have this one which even makes me look vaguely athletic.

A rather unsuccessful lunch break in Chilham where the landlady (not unreasonably, but we weren't feeling reasonable we were HUNGRY) wouldn't let us eat our sandwiches in the pub, and we were off on the last stretch. More woodland gradually gave way to suburb and then city. It was raining by the time we arrived in Canterbury and pretty cold, but we didn't care. We knew by then that my family were waiting at the city gates, and that Connie's were on their way. One glimpse of the Cathedral, and Connie, by now accompanied by "my baby" and secure in the knowledge that she would soon see hers, was off. She was the first to arrive at the Cathedral gates. Ann-Marie and I had to run to join her.
We were greeted by Cannon Claire, last but by no means least of our pilgrimage clergy, and ushered into the crypt for prayers. It was a jubilant, emotional and utterly wonderful experience much improved in the eyes of my and Connie's eldest children by the likeness of the Cathedral crypt to Hogwarts, and in the eyes of our youngest by the presence of each other.

This was actually the last photo taken on the walk

And this, the second to last, was the most atmospheric

But there are loads more which sum up the whole experience more faithfully - you have been warned!

Day 4 - the sisters' tale

2008-03-26T14:12:00.000-07:00

There were more of us on Thursday than on any other day. We were joined by Nigel, my father's friend, Kathryn's teacher, High Sheriff of Kent, and all round lovely guy. He also happens to be a fairly physically fit guy with tight deadlines to meet, so he led the "fast track" group leaving another group to plod along afterwards. My sister and I were in the second group.

We started in Hollingbourne which is only a small village and were soon in beautiful countryside. Peter and Sally did the first couple of miles but just missed out on meeting this monk who was taking a rest on his way to Canterbury. According to local legend (or at least according to my mother) no one knows who put him there.

From then onwards the fast group zoomed away, getting to Charing in time for an early lunch. Juliette, Connie and I took it slower giving time to take in the scenery and have a good gossip. It must have been about 11.30 when we got to the cross on the hill and then it was on to Charing and the countryside between there and Wye. It all brought back lots of memories for us sisters and we talked endlessly, but I hope included Connie too.

Day 3 - into the garden

2008-03-24T02:58:00.000-07:00

Apparently in the army the officers organise boxing matches on the third day of any exercise to diffuse the tension.

There were times when we could have hit each other on our day 3. We were saved by two things; the arrival of dear little Louise and the beautiful countryside which we began to walk through as soon as we left Rochester (which is itself a very lovely little city).

We spent the night at the Travelodge on the M2. It is clean and safe, but has absolutely no atmosphere, and isn't very near Rochester so we were reliant on taxi drivers to get us to and from the city. This they did, eventually, but waiting for them to come meant that we were late for breakfast. This didn't matter really as Louise who'd eaten before she set off, was very tolerant in waiting for us to breakfast at the excellent Cathedral cafe. As we left the grounds, finally ready to start our walking, a groundsman gave us some extra sponsor money. If you have the chance to visit Rochester do do so - it's lovely and the people are very friendly.

Very soon after we left the town, we were into the countryside. We didn't get onto the North Downs Way which we probably could and maybe should have done, but stuck to Bill's maps of the roads and the Pilgrims Way.

This didn't stop us walking along some really beautiful footpaths and had the distinct advantage that we also passed pubs and shops. The locals at the Windmill at Burham were particularly friendly and the landlord gave us both free drinks and some sponsor money.

The others loved the beautiful scenery, and reacted as anyone seeing something new for the first time would. For me it was different. I didn't feel homesick because in a very real sense I WAS at home, in the county where I was brought up. This was particularly evident when we met up with David, a neighbour from my childhood, and when we passed Boxley Waterworks, scene of many a geography field trip.

We were very hungry by the time we got to Detling, crossing the busy road via Jade's Crossing, and ate at the Cock Horse before trundling off for the last section of our day.

Ann-Marie had expressed dissapointment that we weren't going to be finishing at a Cathedral on day 3 and it's true there was no evensong or SS Wesley to greet us in Hollingborne, but as the sun set over the beautiful Kent countryside my mother was there to meet us, and to take us home to her house for eal supper and a rest for our feet.

Day 2 - Crayford to Rochester

2008-03-23T15:35:00.000-07:00

Day 2 always bid fair to be the hardest day, but I think when I look back it will also be the day I'm most proud to have done.

The area between the Thames Estuary and the Medway isn't on your traditional tourist maps, and there's a reason for that. This is the area of the Dartford Crossing, of traffic and motorways and cement factories and pollution. And much of it WAS like that - and yet it was also interesting and inspiring and the end of our day was probably the most emotional time of the whole journey for me.

We stayed in South London for the night with brother-in-law Colin and his wife and son. They were the most wonderful of hosts. We were greeted after our first day's walking with pink bubbly wine and a lovely meal then allowed to rest in comfort before being waved off for day two. I'll write some more about Colin our first "inn keeper" as he deserves a post of his own.

From their house we took the train back to Crayford Station for the beginning of our walk.

Crayford isn't a beauty spot, but the staff at their MacDonalds were as friendly as those elsewhere, and it was a convenient place to start from.

We travelled on, through Dartford which is actually a pretty town with a medieval Church, and not just a crossing. Another Church in the area wasn't quite as picturesque, but had a very good name for their toddler group!

We soon got very tired and the pavements didn't make for easy walking. When I got a friendly text from R asking "where are you now?" I'm afraid the grumpy reply was "In Gravesend where Pocahontas died". Gravesend has its merits, including a very pleasant Inn where we lunched and it's probably worth visiting on its own accord. Ebsfleet on the other hand, as my mother who is a devotee of Ashford International, doesn't yet have much to recommend it as far as I can see although the locals are presumably proud of their football team and their Bishop gets about a bit.

The lead in to Rochester itself is long. At one point I really did think we would make it to Evensong at the Cathedral on time, but it wasn't to be. There was more countryside but there was still a LOT of traffic on our final few miles and we were very tired by the time we saw the Medway. Having been at school in Maidstone and considered the river only fit to throw school hats into at the end of the school year when they were abolished, I was surprised at how emotional I was to see the river. Then again I was VERY tired, and the view from Rochester is VERY different from that from the High Level Bridge in Maidstone. The Cathedral was beautiful, welcoming, calm and restful. The clergy had included us in their prayers AND put out the b-eat information leaflets they had asked for. The choir sang "Lead Me Lord" and I wept with a combination of joy, gratitude and relief.

Charlotte's Day

2008-03-15T01:59:00.000-07:00

We named Day 1 of the walk "Charlotte's Day" after Charlotte, a young woman who lost her life to her eating disorder. At Southwark Cathedral Canon Jane led the prayers for all those whose lives have been lost. It was a fitting and prayerful start to our first step of the journey and the love and care we received at Southwark was to be replicated in many places along our journey.

The first steps were along the busy streets of South London, past well known landmarks and on to less familiar territory.

On Jamaica Road we experienced our first act of public hospitality from the staff of the most amazing MacDonald's. Andy and his staff offered us free drinks for our journey. Christine at Beckenham was as friendly, but I have to admit by the time we got there we were past the point of wishing to get our cameras out. At Greenwich we said goodbye to the girls, and the three of us set off past the palace. If you've never been to Greenwich, which until then I hadn't, please consider a visit - it's absolutely amazing.

After that there was still a long way to go to the end of the day and a lot to see. I'd promised Connie that as we were broadly following the Thames Estuary, the way would be flat. This was of course totally inaccurate. If we'd spent the kind of time Bill did researching the route we'd have known that we would be travelling along "Maze Hill" and might have guessed that it, along with Shooters Hill Road, wouldn't exactly be on the level. Sir John Vanbrugh built his house at the top of Shooters Hill, and let me tell you, he did it for the view not for the pleasure of walking up the thing!

I have more pictures of the rest of the day (I think) which I'll add to this when I finally retrieve them from the camera. In Bexleyheath we re-enacted the parable of the Good Samaritan when asking directions. With our matching T-shirts and folders we undoubtedly DID look as if we were selling something, and housewives and business men hurried on desperate to avoid us. The kids in hoodies smoking by the water feature however, were delighted to help, one of them even remarking delightedly "I've never been any good at this before". With their help we limped on and reached Crayford Station and the train to our first night's rest.

The pilgrims

2008-03-03T12:53:00.000-08:00

The Prologue
In the style of Chaucer, I'll start by introducing the pilgrims.

The mother
First there's me. I'm obviously not QUITE so unfit as I thought I was. I'm certainly no sportswoman, but I made it to the end without major body strain and with no blisters. I've wanted to walk the Pilgrim's Way for years and the co-incidence of being in Southwark where Chaucer's pilgrims started and having a week in which to raise awareness for beat seemed enough to run with. This time last year I probably wouldn't have had the courage to do it or the realisation that I'm not indispensable at home, but this year, having said I'd do it, I got caught up in the enthusiasm of others and began to believe that, just perhaps, it would become a reality.

The friends
I honestly don't think Connie had a clue what she was letting herself in for when she said she'd walk with me, but walk she did, all the way to the end. On the way we had both tears and fun, and it was a real pleasure to have a week together.

Ann-Marie was much more fit when she volunteered to walk, and throughout the days it showed rather. I think we sometimes slowed her down, but she put up with our tortoise-like behaviour. Born profoundly deaf, Ann-Marie has overcome many obstacles in life, and this walk was probably a breeze compared to some of them. Her presence was an inspiration to Connie and me, and without her we probably wouldn't have got to the end.

The girls
Lisa and Nicola registered to walk the first mile, but ended up walking five with us. They were great fun and we enjoyed their company enormously.
Louise walked the most difficult day, day three, when we were crabbed and unpleasant company. Bravely she joined us as planned for the fourth day also. She is a wonderful girl and it was amazing to meet her.
The grandmother
My mother fully intended to walk with us, but an unfortunate foot injury prevented it. Instead she performed the vital task of fetching and carrying us from some of our stops, and was there both at the beginning to wave us off and at the end to welcome us home.

The sister
My sister did day four with us, and helped to make it the day of most fun for all of us. It was lovely to see you Juliette, hope you enjoyed yourself.

The Priests
When I've finished writing all the rest of the thank you letters, I'm going to write to Archbishop Rowan to thank him for his Church. The CofE gets a lot of bad press, some of it deserved, but in his own back yard, it certainly knows how to support a weary pilgrim or two. We were given a truly holy send off by Canon Jane at Southwark, a warm welcome and some good practical support by Philip at Rochester, and our whole families were received and blessed at the end by Canon Claire of Canterbury. Through the wonders of text messaging we also had Kathryn our personal priest with us all the way.

The senior citizens
Peter and Sally joined us for part of day four. Peter's knowledge of the area and of walking in general was phenominal, and it was just splendid to have Sally the listener with us as we walked through some of the most beautiful of countryside.

The Professor
Professor Janet Treasure, who is, as Bill described her, one of those people with more letters after her name than in it, DID wave us off from Southwark but I can't prove it. I don't have any photos because, bless her, she was holding the cameras.

The dignitaries
Nigel Wheeler is a friend of my father's. He is also High Sheriff of Kent. More importantly he is also a charismatic and inspiring person. We were very blessed to have him walk with us on day four. I say walk with US, because he actually walked with the "fast group" including Louise and Ann-Marie, leaving the tortoises (me, Connie and Juliette) more time to admire the scenery and take in the fresh air ;-)
He was joined for part of the walk by Richard a local councillor, and by several other friends who didn't make it into the photos. The monk in the picture however, did not move a muscle to help us, but I think you'll agree he's a fun sort of person to meet on your way.

The husband
Bill probably deserves a post of his own. Without him the walk would undoubtedly have remained a dream and Connie's offer to come with me just a passing joke. Bill spent hours on the website planning the routes and advertising the walk. All the time we were walking he was supporting us and tracking our movements. He was there at the end in Canterbury, but then again he was there all the way along too really.

we did it!

2008-03-03T12:44:00.000-08:00

and between us we have masses of pictures and not a few blisters to show for it - so now that it's not an impossible dream but a thing of memories, I'm going to put my pictures up here and tell you something about our experiences. For news of the fundraising position, more pictures and the reflections of others see www.walk4beat.co.uk

The Scholars' Tale

2008-02-14T12:35:00.000-08:00

Charlton Kings Junior School raised a wonderful £224.71 for us via their mufti-day and we collected their cheque today. THANK YOU so much to the staff and pupils there.

Pates Grammar School have also been fund-raising and some of the proceeds of their Valentines Day extravaganza will go to beat. Particular thanks are due to Omar Javed who informed the charity committee of our effort, Naomi Hammond who has been liaising with us, and the unnamed boy in the sixth form who bought a carnation for every single girl in his year.

It would seem that pupils at both schools have much more fun than this chap in the picture ever did in his education.

Company

2008-02-09T13:07:00.000-08:00

I'm absolutely delighted that several people will be joining us on the walk, either for parts of it or for all. If you want to join us there's still time to register with Bill at www.walk4beat.co.uk
Who knows, perhaps we'll make as large a group as the original pilgrims, but please, even if you have one, don't bring a horse. I think the streets of London, not to mention those of Rochester and Canterbury have changed somewhat since the 14th Century.

The religious bit

2008-02-09T11:34:00.000-08:00

I'm very conscious that while, for many of my sponsors, the "religious" bit of the walk is the most important, for others it will be meaningless or worse. For the record, I am an Anglican, and the visits to the three Cathedrals will be very important to me. I don't expect anyone else to share my enthusiasm, but if they do, then they'll be welcome to share the prayers as well. These are coming from home Churches as well as the en-route

We will start at Southwark at 10am with prayers with Canon Jane Steen (when did I get so old that Canons can be younger and considerably prettier than me?). My mother, bless her, will be waiting outside to welcome those of you who don't want to go in.

On the Tuesday Canon Hesketh has ensured that we will be welcome to join in the Evensong service at Rochester Cathedral and prayers will be said for beat and all with eating disorders. However attendance is far from compulsory and Connie may well decide to head for the comfort of the Travel Lodge instead, and as long as she doesn't use up all the hot water that'll be fine.

On the Friday we will end the walk at Canterbury Cathedral which of course has been a centre of pilgrimage for centuries. Again, anyone who wishes to attend Evensong is assured of a warm welcome by Angela Prior the events coordinator. Please though, if you DO intend to do so, can you let us know as soon as possible so that we can let her know numbers. As long as we get there in reasonable time there are plenty of secular reminders of Chaucer's Pilgrims and I for one intend to visit The Chaucer Bookshop and the impressive city walls. Apparently there still plenty of pubs and restaurants in the city as well as I'm sure there were in Geoffrey's day too.

Events...

2008-02-02T12:01:00.001-08:00

have rather got in the way of serious training, and certainly of blogging about it.

We HAVE been walking - in fact owing to a serious problem with my car, I've been walking or cycling everywhere, and we HAVE been spreading the word about the walk (take a look at Bill's website for the latest news) but we could have done more if it hadn't been for the other things that have been going on.

Some of them have been celebrations - my daughter and all three of Connie's daughters have had their birthdays in January. Some of them have been frustrating but ultimately successful. My husband and I have had to shuffle money around owing to the maturity of our mortgage - no we're not now stinking rich but we're more secure than we were, but the paperwork has taken time. Some of them have just been annoying, like the car problems which both our families have faced. Hopefully all of them are over now and we can get on with some proper preparation. It's only 22 days to go.

Extreme sports

2008-01-17T15:08:00.000-08:00

Our walk cannot be included under this category. It is largely, as this gentleman who will be joining us on the Thursday, described it, "a wander".

However today it felt a bit like it.

We walked from home to Connie's parents' in law's house in Gloucester for some more of the lovely Christmas cake. The walk was about 10 miles during which we experienced some sunshine, some cloud, a fair bit of biting wind, and one hour of absolutely torrential rain. My waterproofs have been well and truly christened. They did very well and we were only slightly damp on arrival, but boy do I hope the weather isn't like that for tooooo much of our 75 miles.

Picking up

2008-01-13T07:37:00.001-08:00

Our colds are wearing off and we are doing better with our training.

We walked to Bishops Cleeve and back yesterday, stopping off for a very good lunch at the Kings Head on our way. The distance was probably about 12 miles which is an ideal walk for our training.

What we had to prove, to ourselves if to no one else, was that we could wake up again the next morning and still move.

We can. We went for a swim this morning and managed our pool exercises quite well. My legs are now siezing up as I am sitting at the computer which is probably an arguement for more exericse not less. We'll see how we are tomorrow.

Gathering speed

2008-01-10T14:55:00.000-08:00

The preparations and the fund-raising that is - Connie and I are still very slowed down by our colds and all hope of doing both a 9 mile walk and the aquarobics went straight out of the window today. We had a nice stroll round Gloucester and delivered some posters to several GP surgeries before descending on Connie's parents in law for a welcome cup of tea and slice of Christmas cake and a lift back to the car. In all we probably did about 6 miles which was fine but we'll need to get a bit fitter before 25th February.

The preparations of others however are really gathering pace. Hannah at beat has been fantastic and has some really good ideas which we will be following through. Various friends and family are hoping to join us for the first day, we will be welcomed to Rochester Cathedral on the evening of 26th February (as I said before, I am very much looking forward to visiting the Cathedrals but please don't let it put you off supporting the walk or joining in if it isn't your thing) and the former High Sheriff of Kent is hoping to join us with some other local men and maids of Kent (or Kentish men and maids) for the walk on the Thursday.

Now all we need is to shake off these colds and really start the preparations our end.

A little break

2008-01-07T23:01:00.001-08:00

Connie and I both have nasty colds and so are taking a little break from our training to rest our bodies. Hopefully we'll be back on form by Thursday to go delivering posters in Gloucester.

Meanwhile we're trying to get some of the rest of the walk organised like accommodation and stop and start times. We're still very much hoping to visit the Cathedrals on the way, but please be assured that just because I'm a member of the Church of England doesn't mean that you can't join in if you are of a different religious persuasion or none.

Training

2008-01-03T14:10:00.001-08:00

New Year, New Resolve - to keep anyone reading this up to date with the preparations for the walk.

I understand from Bill that an old friend has contacted about joining in with the walk. Yay! that's absolutely great.

I've also had a very kind phone call from one of the GP surgeries I contacted saying they'll put up posters about the Carers' Conference and b-eat - Yay again!

On a more practical level Connie and I have been training both by walking in our new, softer and lighter boots, and at the local gym.

One of the many nasty things about eating disorders is the fear and black and white thinking they induce both in sufferers and those around them.

Over-exercising can be a real problem in anorexia and bulimia. This does NOT mean that gyms are full of sick people being encouraged to be sicker. Our local club is just that, a local club full of normal local people, the nurse, the teacher, the retired fireman, the social worker, the mum, the sports student, the amputee... and the staff are there to ensure that we use the facility safely, and have FUN - which, in Sue's aquarobics session Connie and I are definitely doing. Thank you Sue, and Russell on the desk, and all those at the club who are proving so encouraging.

Sister site

2007-12-16T06:49:00.000-08:00

Bill, Connie's husband, has been hard at work on an "official" site for us. It's official in that it's exceedingly professional and he's done a wonderful job on it. However it's not a part of b-eat itself.
Check it out here if you can - it explains far better than I can what the walk is all about.

These boots were made for walking..

2007-12-10T14:22:00.001-08:00

but we're going to have to get used to them first.

Connie and I have been given boots for the walk, and will also be being clothed appropriately for whatever the February weather can throw at us by local company it'smykit.

The boots are fantastic but we probably shouldn't have walked 8 miles in them on the first day. We managed a circular walk through the pretty local villages of Prestbury and Bishops Cleeve, but our feet very nearly didn't! Although we set off from a dentists and passed three surgeries on the way, I forgot the posters, so that aspect of the walk wasn't so successful.

We're concentrating on breaking the boots in gradually now, and wore alternative footwear on the pleasant journey from Charlton Kings to Churchdown on Sunday. We failed in our original aim of getting to Gloucester Royal Hospital in time for me to get to work, and had to stop and get a lift from the Hare and Hounds, but that was more as a result of mistiming our efforts rather than from getting tired. Both of us felt pretty good at the end and we're looking forward to making a second assault on Gloucester on Thursday, this time aiming for Abbeymead. We'll deliver posters on the way if we make it, and if we remember to take them!

Why?

2007-11-24T08:55:00.000-08:00

There was an excellent piece on Radio 4's Excess Baggage today about the medieval pilgrims. I guess in many ways my aims are the same as theirs - to do some good both to me and to the world, and to have fun along the way.

Why the Pilgrim's Way? Because I loved studying Chaucer at school and have always wanted to walk more of the route than I did with the church youth group when I was 16.

Why b-eat? Because the organisation, and in particular our local organiser Pat, continue to provide me with understanding and support as I attempt to support my daughter who has had eating problems.

Why February? well the weather might not be as kind to us as it was to Chaucer's pilgrims but we'll take the risk. It's because it's when Eating Disorders Awareness Week is and the walk is very much about generating awareness. If we wrap up warm we'll be fine.

Company

2007-11-22T09:40:00.001-08:00

I'd always intended to do the walk with others. Unfortunately my dear father who inspired me to "get involved" is going to be getting himself involved in the England Cricket Tour to New Zealand, so won't be able to walk with me, but I'm very much hoping that my mother, sister, brother-in-law and one or both of my daughters will do bits with me.

For me though, "family" has a wider definition, and I'm absolutely delighted that not only may my lovely god-daughter who is in the picture join in a little bit, but her mother is going to attempt the lot.

We've been "training" today. We reckon we did about 6 miles in under 2 1/2 hours and don't feel too dead at the end of it. We've also delivered b-eat leaflets to ten doctors' surgeries and an obliging pharmacy (and been turned away from an unobliging one) so it's not bad for our first attempt.

And so it begins

2007-11-03T12:21:00.000-07:00

As if I didn't spend enough time on the Internet, this is my new blog. It's in its experimental stages and I'm sure I will be editing it quite a few times before anyone really sees it - but, along with the preparations for the walk itself, it is now a reality rather than just a dream.